There is a story of Reb Shneur Zalman of Liadi, that once he asked his son what he “prays with.” The boy answered that he inspires himself with the verse:
יִשְׁתַּחֲו֣וּ לְ֭ךָ וִיזַמְּרוּ־לָ֑ךְ יְזַמְּר֖וּ שִׁמְךָ֣ סֶֽלָה׃ כׇּל־הָאָ֤רֶץ All the earth bows to You and sings hymns to You; all sing hymns to Your Name, Selah. - Psalm 66:4 The boy then asked the rebbe, “What do you pray with, Abba?” He answered, “I pray with the bench and the floor.” There is a Sanctuary beyond words: a Place in which the heart is free and the mind is clear. This Place is a refuge from all stress, from all problems; that Place is Here; it is the “bench” upon which we sit, the “floor” upon which we stand. And yet, the ordinary human mind overlooks this Place. Living life almost entirely through the movement of the mind, this Sanctuary becomes overrun with the impulsive urgency of thought. In our search for peace, we may attempt to put our lives in order, to arrange things to our liking, so that stress and chaos are kept at bay. This ordering of life is a wonderful and necessary thing, but when you come to see that the source of all chaos and worry is actually your own mind, you can transcend chaos at the root. You can and must still organize things, but you’re not dependent on that for your sanity. Meaning: even when there is chaos, loss, failure and uncertainty, which there always will be, the Sanctuary is not lost. And yet, this is still a big secret, even for long-time spiritual practitioners: they may enter the Sanctuary in moments of prayer and meditation, but they cannot seem to stay connected in the midst of life. In this week’s special reading for Shabbat Sukkot, Moses seems to have this very problem. Moses – the one who speaks with the Divine face-to-face – is afraid that the Presence will depart and not accompany him on his journey of leading the people: רְ֠אֵ֠ה אַתָּ֞ה אֹמֵ֤ר אֵלַי֙ הַ֚עַל אֶת־הָעָ֣ם הַזֶּ֔ה וְאַתָּה֙ לֹ֣א הֽוֹדַעְתַּ֔נִי אֵ֥ת אֲשֶׁר־תִּשְׁלַ֖ח עִמִּ֑י... See, You say to me, ‘Lead this people onward’, but You did not reveal whom You will send with me…” - Shemot (Exodus) 33:12 Moses is afraid that the One who sends him on his mission will abandon him. What is the response? פָּנַ֥י יֵלֵ֖כוּ וַהֲנִחֹ֥תִי לָֽךְ׃ “My Presence will go and give you rest!” The Presence “goes” wherever you go! That’s because the “Presence” is not something separate from your own presence, from your awareness when it is actually present. And when your awareness is present, there is “rest”. The word here for “I will give rest,” הֲנִחֹתִי hanikhoti, has the same root as the name נֹחַ Noakh, the fellow who built the ark for the great flood. A different metaphor, but the idea is the same: there is an “ark” that floats above the “raging waters” in which you can find refuge. In the case of Moses and the Israelites, they lived in temporary dwellings on their journeys – the sukkot in which Jews everywhere are now preparing to dwell for this festival that commemorates the ancient tents of the Israelites. The sukkah is a sanctuary, yet it is not a solid thing. Open to the sky, vulnerable to the elements, it is really just a frame, not secure at all. And that’s the paradox: freeing your mind from thought does not mean something hard or effortful; it means relaxing the mind, allowing the mind to be open to the fullness of what is already present. But still, to do this consistently takes a special kind of effort that eludes most people. So much of the language of prayer expresses a longing for the fruit of this effort: אַחַ֤ת שָׁאַ֣לְתִּי מֵֽאֵת־יְהֹ–וָה֮ אוֹתָ֢הּ אֲבַ֫קֵּ֥שׁ שִׁבְתִּ֣י בְּבֵית־יְ֭הֹ–וָה כׇּל־יְמֵ֣י חַיַּ֑י לַחֲז֥וֹת בְּנֹעַם־יְ֝הֹ–וָ֗ה וּלְבַקֵּ֥ר בְּהֵֽיכָלֽוֹ׃ Only one thing I ask of You, Hashem, that I should dwell in Your house and meditate in Your sanctuary all the days of my life!- Psalm 27 The Sanctuary of Presence is ever-present, yet it is so easy to block. Like the sun: the sun is 864,938 miles in diameter, yet you can block its view entirely with just your little hand. And yet, even while you are blocking the Presence, the blocking is itself happening in the present. The only thing blocking God, ultimately, is God: וְהָיָה֙ בַּעֲבֹ֣ר כְּבֹדִ֔י וְשַׂמְתִּ֖יךָ בְּנִקְרַ֣ת הַצּ֑וּר וְשַׂכֹּתִ֥י כַפִּ֛י עָלֶ֖יךָ עַד־עׇבְרִֽי׃ “It will be when My Glory passes, I shall place you in a cleft in the rock and shield you with My hand…” - Shemot (Exodus) 33:22 When our fleeting and immaterial thoughts hide the “glory” of this passing moment, hardening the openness of the present into what feels like a narrow cleft of rock on all sides, remember: your thoughts themselves are also part of this moment. Accept them with openness and let them pass as well. In accepting and releasing your thoughts, they can dissolve, revealing the open space once again: וַהֲסִרֹתִי֙ אֶת־כַּפִּ֔י וְרָאִ֖יתָ אֶת־אֲחֹרָ֑י... “Then I will remove My hand and you will see my ‘back’…” Meaning: you will see in retrospect that your thoughts which block the Sanctuary are themselves part of the Sanctuary. They are part of the reality of the present moment. Then, bring your attention back to literally anything physical that is already present; bring yourself back to the bench and the floor. The more you train yourself to do this, the more you will become aware of the space behind whatever is present: the ineffable Openness that you are: Consciousness Itself.
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